The Solar System......

Today, Jimmy Dean died......famous for his song "Big John".......famous for staring as a compatriot of James Bond in "Diamonds are Forever"........famous for staring in his own variety show on network television before I was old enough to know what the hell that was.......but most, famous for powering the entire universe as we know it.

Technically, he sold his sausage company to Sara Lee years ago - but as we all have learned in just the past year, Jimmy Dean Sausage Breakfast Sandwiches literally fuel the solar system.

I MEAN OUR OWN VERY OWN FUCKING SOLAR SYSTEM! AS IN THE SUN AND ALL OF THE PLANETS THAT REVOLVE AROUND IT!

So now what do we do? I mean seriously........what's gonna happen when they don't get their sandwich each morning to start their day??

We've all seen what happens when they get lethargic. They wobble off thier axis's and smash into each other at worst or just sit down where they are at best. Either was it spells disaster of a Mayan 2012 kind of flavor to it.

So I'm begging all of my readers to let's all get together and do something (yea I know that when I say "all my readers" that just means the 3 of you that are left - hell, my wife doesn't even read it anymore......but soon, after the universe falls in on itself.....even that won't really matter anymore - will it?!!)

So write your congressman and let him know that we demand that something be done to head this problem off before it's too late.

And if something bad does happen, just remember where you heard it first.

Not that there will be any "history" books left to write my name in.

Peace