Victim Of Love
Tomorrow is the day.
VD.
The big one.
For the last 11 years of my life, that day has been known as the anniversary of the day my father died.
No more.
Now, tomorrow is a day to celebrate life and love. To reach inside of myself and be able to truly extract what is righteous in my world. To look life in the eye and smile knowing that everything is as it was meant to be. To realize that this time it's real and I will never have to rationalize about this kind of stuff ever again in my life.
And that feels good. So very good.
It's hard for me sometimes to understand what has happened in my life. It's like I was walking in the fog for so very long - just catching glimpses of what is good in the world. But the fog never seemed to lift. I was stuck totally in the moment. I was caught in the glimmer of what should have been.
Now the day is bright and clear and I can truly see for miles.
There is something inside of me that realizes that I just started the third quarter. Halftime is over, the meal has been served and we are starting the second half.
It's very cool that I actually have more energy than when I started the game. I think of all the life that has been lived and all the time that has been spent posturing for life. All those years of school. All the time spent trying to figure out what I wanted to be when I grew up. All the relationships that didn't quite fit and the explosions that occured when I tried to "make" it fit.
As I sit here today I can honestly say that my life is as good as I could have ever imagined it. As a matter of fact, there is no way that I "deserve" what I have. And yet I have it.
I think GRACE just rocks!!!
VD.
The big one.
For the last 11 years of my life, that day has been known as the anniversary of the day my father died.
No more.
Now, tomorrow is a day to celebrate life and love. To reach inside of myself and be able to truly extract what is righteous in my world. To look life in the eye and smile knowing that everything is as it was meant to be. To realize that this time it's real and I will never have to rationalize about this kind of stuff ever again in my life.
And that feels good. So very good.
It's hard for me sometimes to understand what has happened in my life. It's like I was walking in the fog for so very long - just catching glimpses of what is good in the world. But the fog never seemed to lift. I was stuck totally in the moment. I was caught in the glimmer of what should have been.
Now the day is bright and clear and I can truly see for miles.
There is something inside of me that realizes that I just started the third quarter. Halftime is over, the meal has been served and we are starting the second half.
It's very cool that I actually have more energy than when I started the game. I think of all the life that has been lived and all the time that has been spent posturing for life. All those years of school. All the time spent trying to figure out what I wanted to be when I grew up. All the relationships that didn't quite fit and the explosions that occured when I tried to "make" it fit.
As I sit here today I can honestly say that my life is as good as I could have ever imagined it. As a matter of fact, there is no way that I "deserve" what I have. And yet I have it.
I think GRACE just rocks!!!
posted by KK at 8:33 AM
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