Home
I think of the concept of home often.
What is home? How is it defined? Is it a place or a state of mind?
My father was in the army. We moved around a bit. I went to six different elementary schools in six years.
There is a certain strength you gain from experiences like that but there is also a sucking sound where your heart should be. You are forever an outsider that has to make his own way with no true loyalties - you are always the "new kid".
When we moved to Hattiesburg, I was 11 years old and it didn't take me long to get used to the thing that was Hattiesburg. The public schools had been integrated the previous year and everything was quite new and interesting.
I was good at making friends and I slid right in.
And in no time at all - Hattiesburg felt like home. That was 34 years ago and now I can't imagine living anywhere else.
I have traveled the world several times over and have an amazing wealth of experience and perspective, but always, at the end of a journey, I yearn for home.
The same can be said of relationships. There are so many that are necessary. I remember the joys of high school where you felt like you owned the place - but the one down side to that was that there were so many people you HAD to assoicate with because they went to the same high school
As I entered college, it was easier to pick and choose those you hung out with so there was much more freedom involved and it was more fun.
The same can be said for adult life. There are those at work that I interact with on a daily basis that I would rather not, but they work at the same place so what choice do you have?
So that leaves the most important thing - the relationships that really mean something. I have had all kinds of relationships - those that were electrifying and those that just were blah. In each of those I felt trapped to some extent.
But after so many trials and tribulations I now find myself in a relationship with a girl that absolutely defines the core of my very soul. For the first time in my life, I am truly free to be who I want to be and have no roles to play.
It would take a large novel to describe what this means to me so I will be brief: It feels like home. It feels as if I belong. Nothing is irritating. Everything is a joy. There is no inconvenience allowed, the love and respect override all of those negative emotions.
So now, as I look around, I look for people in a similar circumstance and we are able to look at each other as exclusive members of a club.
In short, we have found the secret - the meaning of life.
And it feels just like home.
I wish this for all of you.
What is home? How is it defined? Is it a place or a state of mind?
My father was in the army. We moved around a bit. I went to six different elementary schools in six years.
There is a certain strength you gain from experiences like that but there is also a sucking sound where your heart should be. You are forever an outsider that has to make his own way with no true loyalties - you are always the "new kid".
When we moved to Hattiesburg, I was 11 years old and it didn't take me long to get used to the thing that was Hattiesburg. The public schools had been integrated the previous year and everything was quite new and interesting.
I was good at making friends and I slid right in.
And in no time at all - Hattiesburg felt like home. That was 34 years ago and now I can't imagine living anywhere else.
I have traveled the world several times over and have an amazing wealth of experience and perspective, but always, at the end of a journey, I yearn for home.
The same can be said of relationships. There are so many that are necessary. I remember the joys of high school where you felt like you owned the place - but the one down side to that was that there were so many people you HAD to assoicate with because they went to the same high school
As I entered college, it was easier to pick and choose those you hung out with so there was much more freedom involved and it was more fun.
The same can be said for adult life. There are those at work that I interact with on a daily basis that I would rather not, but they work at the same place so what choice do you have?
So that leaves the most important thing - the relationships that really mean something. I have had all kinds of relationships - those that were electrifying and those that just were blah. In each of those I felt trapped to some extent.
But after so many trials and tribulations I now find myself in a relationship with a girl that absolutely defines the core of my very soul. For the first time in my life, I am truly free to be who I want to be and have no roles to play.
It would take a large novel to describe what this means to me so I will be brief: It feels like home. It feels as if I belong. Nothing is irritating. Everything is a joy. There is no inconvenience allowed, the love and respect override all of those negative emotions.
So now, as I look around, I look for people in a similar circumstance and we are able to look at each other as exclusive members of a club.
In short, we have found the secret - the meaning of life.
And it feels just like home.
I wish this for all of you.
posted by KK at 8:10 AM
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