Tuesday, January 29, 2008

Great Story

Here's a story I found about an old green beret. I found it very entertaining so I figured I would share it.

There is always hope for America!

BREVARD, Jan. 19, 2008, “ Retired Army Green Beret Smokey Taylor got his court martial this weekend and came away feeling good about it.

Taylor, at age 80 the oldest member of Chapter XXXIII of the Special Forces Association, was on trial by his peers under the charge of failing to use a weapon of sufficient caliber in the shooting of an intruder at his home in Knoxville, TN, in December.

The entire affair, of course, was very much tongue in cheek. Taylor had been awakened in the early morning hours of Dec. 17, 2007, when an intruder broke into his home. He investigated the noises with one of his many weapons in hand.

When the intruder threatened him with a knife, Taylor warned him, then brought his .22 caliber pistol to bear and shot him right between the eyes.

“That boy had the hardest head I’ve ever seen, Taylor said after his trial. The bullet bounced right off.”

The impact knocked the would-be thief down momentarily. He crawled out of the room then got up and ran out the door and down the street. Knoxville police apprehended him a few blocks away and he now awaits trial in the Knox County jail.

The charges against Taylor were considered to be serious. He is a retired Special Forces Weapons Sergeant with extensive combat experience during the wars in Korea and Vietnam.

Charges were brought against him under the premise that he should have saved the county and taxpayers the expense of a trial, said Chapter XXXIII President Bill Long of Asheville. He could have used a .45 or .38. The .22 just wasn’t big enough to get the job done.

Taylor’s defense attorney, another retired Weapons Sergeant, disagreed. He said Taylor had done the right thing in choosing to arm himself with a .22.

“If he’d used a .45 or something like that the round would have gone right through the perp, the wall, the neighbor’s wall and possibly injured some innocent child asleep in its bed, he said. I believe the evidence shows that Smokey Taylor exercised excellent judgment in his choice of weapons. He did nothing wrong, and clearly remains to this day an excellent weapons man.”

Counsel for the defense then floated a theory as to why the bullet bounced off the perp’s forehead.

He was victimized by old ammunition, he said, just as he was in Korea and again in Vietnam, when his units were issued ammo left over from World War II.

Taylor said nothing in his own defense, choosing instead to allow his peers to debate the matter. After the trial he said the ammunition was indeed old and added the new information that the perp had soiled his pants as he crawled out of the house.

“I would have had an even worse mess to clean up if it had gone through his forehead, Taylor said. It was good for both of us that it didn’t.”

Following testimony from both sides, Taylor was acquitted of the charges and was given a round of applause.

Meanwhile, back in Knox County, the word is out: Don’t go messing with Smokey Taylor. He just bought a whole bunch of fresh ammo.

Monday, January 28, 2008

First Time For Everything

Well, it finally happened.

We took off for New Orleans on Friday evening to arrive in a very cold and drenching rain. 40 degrees and wet is not much fun but everything is well centered in New Orleans so the exposure to the weather is not too bad.

We ran from the parking lot to a nice 120 year old restaurant for some glorious corned beef sandwiches and drinks and then dashed to Coyote Ugly for some entertainment before the concert.

When all was in place, we dashed to the House of Blues to catch the final three songs of the warm up band and more drinks.

Then we burrowed our way to the front of the crowd by the stage and awaited Robin Trower and his band.

Then the spry 68 year old guitar god came on stage and started.

At first, I was thinking I was turned wrong.

So I moved a bit more towards the center.

Then it got worse and worse.

I found myself nervous and in pain.

Then, the unthinkable happened as an hour into the concert, I turned to my buds and said -

Drum roll please..............

This is way too loud - It's killing me and I'm leaving.

Everyone followed me out.

I'm not proud of this as it may indicate that I may be getting O-L-D.

But the others with me heartily agreed to go.

So at least I'm not alone in my wimpdom.

And with my tail in my hand, I'm going back to rubbing my ears and hoping the ringing goes away soon.

Peace (and quiet!)


Friday, January 25, 2008

Presidential politics

My friend Sid came up with the perfect presidential contender. Please go and check it out at http://rachellucas.com/?p=580

And if you don't like this one, then bite me!

Trower Power

Going to see Robin Trower tonight in New Orleans.

I'm taking my son with me, who says "who is Robin Trower?"

And many of you may not know either - because you're goobers.

Robin Trower was the guitarist for Procol Harum in the 60's and early 70's. He left in 1972 because he had a dream that he wanted to be like Jimi Hendrix, who had influenced him greatly.

As he did all of us.

So in 1973 he released "Twice Removed From Yesterday". A very cool album but it did not garner much attention. I certainly missed it.

The next year he released "Bridge of Sighs" which was an immediate hit on FM AOR radio.

A monster hit.
It is one of the coolest albums of all time. Spacy, Tripy, Hard Rockin', Bluesy - you name it, it was there.

One of the only albums in my memory banks that I can say that every song is amazing.

At age 14, it was the coolest thing I'd ever heard. And it was new - which was huge back then. All of us freaks listened to the "cool" old stuff. Stones, Hendrix, The Who - but when you come up with a new one, well that just put you at the top of the heap.

Anyway, I saw him about 5 years ago and he was still great and I'm looking forward to tonight very much.

Now if we could only do something about this damn cold weather.

Oh well, that's the price you pay to get your music jones fixed.


Thursday, January 24, 2008


I think this chicken's hot!

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Where For Art Thou, Dreamhouse?

The decision has been made to move on up to the East Side.

Or wherever that was that George and Weezie went!

Yep, after all the work on our house, we're a-sellin' it and moving onward.

Moving is so huge and in the past, I would have been mortified to even attempt something like this when we're so comfy where we are.

But this time, I'm actually excited about it.

Our house is too small. It's nice - but it's way too small.

So we started that process yesterday. All weekend my baby packed closets and got everything looking so very Southern Living and we put the house on the market yesterday. We went out late yesterday afternoon and looked and looked.

I mean "officially" looked. We've been perusing the neighborhoods and talking highs and lows for a few weeks. But yesterday we got in the car with the Realtor and went off to find our dream home.

And I found the quandry right away................

Each house has something you really like about it - but none of the houses had everything you want.

It's like some kind of perverted test to see what you'll give up for that one thing you just gotta have!

My list of stuff I gotta have is pretty small. I think.

So I'll list them in terms of NEEDS and then the WANTS:

I need a nice house that my wife will be proud of and will let me entertain as often as I like.

I need a neighborhood that I'll like walking down the street in - something established that doesn't look like a cow pasture that someone plopped houses in the middle of.

I need an outdoor storage thingy to put my S-H-I-T in that will be my sanctuary from mundane life.

I need a home office that will also allow me to have my "stuff" that doesn't go with the rest of the decor - all boys know what I mean here....................my gaudy boy stuff. Guns, rebel flags, big speakers........you get the picture. Oh yea, and along this same line of thinking - it has to have a DOOR!

That pretty much covers my needs - now all I have to deal with is my wants - and they aren't quite so clear in my head. Which falls squarely under the category of "I'll know it when I see it"!

I want a nice kitchen. I'd love a gourmet professional kitchen but we're not millionaires (yet) so that will probably have to wait. I'll just take something that is well laid out with plenty of storage. A pantry would be a huge bonus for me. So would granite counter tops. And gas. OK, I'll stop on the kitchen because whatever it is, won't be enough - so lets not worry about it. I've been doing as good as I can with what I have for all of my life anyway!

I want some wood floors. Nice wood floors in the great room and associated living spaces. I love wood floors.

I want 4 bedrooms as well as the office space I listed under needs. But it may be that the 4th bedroom would have to be an office and that would be OK. I just WANT both.

I want a covered patio space that is nice. This is very close to a need, but in the department of being realistic, I've put it in the want column.

I want landscaping. I don't want to live in a new yard ever again. It's a pain in the ass. It may be necessary to have a new yard if we go with new construction but I'll certainly give a big check mark to some nice trees, grass and plants already there. I hate yard work.................

And that about covers both lists for me. I find myself inching upwards in the price range as I search for all those wants and needs. I'm pretty sure that I'll price myself out of my range before I find the perfect house. But it's fun to look!

Wherever we go, it will be fine. Because I happen to live with the girl of my dreams and no matter where we may roost, I'll be one happy boy!

So wish me luck!

And on a side note - It is wonderful that the Fed cut the interest rate by the largest margin in recent history today. It's a good time to be buying and selling! I just got $25,000 more house for the same money.

It's better to be lucky than good - ain't it?


Friday, January 18, 2008

Dear Mr. Terrorist

I found this open letter to our arab friends on my cowboy forum. I thought it was very nice so I decided to share it here.

Now it's no secret that a goodly portion of our population are very patriotic and there are many who belive that service to our country is vital.

I don't get too heavily involved in these things from a personal point of view - but as the son of a career soldier, there is a great pool of pride that bubbles right under my surface for all the people we have that do feel strongly about these things.

So here's the letter - let me know what you think.

Dear Terrorists,

I am a Navy Aviator. I was born and raised in a small town in New England . I come from a family of five. I was raised in a middle class home and taught my values by my mother and father.

My dad worked a series of jobs in finance and my mom took care of us kids. We were not an overly religious family but attended church most Sundays. It was a nice small Episcopal Church. I have a brother and sister and I am the youngest in my family. I was the first in many generations to attend college.

I have flown Naval aircraft for 16 years. For me the flying was never a lifelong dream or a 'calling,' it just happened. I needed a job and I liked the challenge. I continue to do it today because I feel it is important to give back to a nation which has given so much to me. I do it because, although I will never be rich, my family will be comfortable.

My government has spent millions to train me to fly thesemulti-million dollar aircraft. I make about 70,000 dollars a year and after 20 years will be offered a pension.

I like baseball but think the players make too much money. I am in awe of firemen and policemen and what they do each day for my community, and like teachers, they just don't get paid enough.

I respect my elders and always use sir or ma'am when addressing a stranger. I'm not sure about kids these days but I think that's normal for every generation.

I tell you all this because when I come for you, I want you to know me. I won't be hiding behind a woman or a child. I won't be disguised or pretending to be something I am not. I will be in a U.S. issue flight suit. I will be wearing standard US issue flight gear, and I will be flying a navy aircraft clearly marked as a US warplane.

I wish we could meet up close in a small room where I could wrap my hands around your throat and slowly squeeze the life out of you, but unfortunately, you're hiding in a hole in the ground, so we will have to do this a different way.

I want you to know also that I am very good at what I do. I can put a 2,000 lb. weapon through a window from 10,000 feet up. I generally only fly at night, so you may want to start sleeping during the day. I am not eager to die for my country but I am willing to sacrifice my life to protect it from animals like you.

I will do everything in my power to ensure no civilians are hurt as I take aim at you.

My countrymen are a forgiving bunch. Many are already forgetting what you did on Sept 11th. But I will not forget!! I am coming. I hope you know me a little bit better, see you soon...sleep tight.

A U.S. Navy Pilot

Monday, January 14, 2008

KK - Lesbian?

I love girl singer/songwriters!!!

I mean all of ‘em. I love me some Indigo Girls and Sarah McLaughlin and Joni Mitchell and, well, you name the girl and I can assure you that I love her.

I was listening to Natalie Merchant today. She ain’t pretty – but she does sing like an angel. Which counts for lots since we’re talking about singers…………

This chick seems to sing right through the heart of the matter for me.

And I love that.

I especially love her song “Wonder”

It’s such a strong song about such things as life and affirmation.

Most of you that know me understand that I am infected with a very sunny disposition and the ability to believe in the inherent goodness of mankind.

I truly believe that we can choose or not choose to be happy. Surely life will throw things at us all the time to get in the way of happy – but we can deal with those at well.

I guess that I just believe that if you have the basics in life – which is what I call having someone that you love no matter what the circumstances are – then you will be just fine.

So the rest of life is just stuff to do in order to get back to what you really want to do – which should be loving someone beyond what you thought was possible.

But back to the song “Wonder”………….

Is it wrong to assume that you are special just because you believe it?

Is “special” a label that is applied to you or are you born with it?

Is it arrogance to consider yourself special?

I don’t know the answer to that – it’s just one of those things that I ponder each and every day.
One thing I do know is that I love someone so much that by that very act, I feel special and for those that don’t believe me – well, you can just bite me.

Here’s the lyrics:

Doctors have come from distant cities
Just to see me
Stand over my bed
Disbelieving what they are seeing

They say I must be one of the wonders
Of God’s own creation
And as far as they see
They can offer no explanation

Newspapers ask intimate questions
Want confessions
They reach into my head
To steal the glory of my story

They say I must be one of the wonders
Of God’s own creation
And as far as they see
They can offer no explanation

I believe
Fate smiled and destiny
Laughed as she came to my cradle
“Know this child will be able”
Laughed as my body she lifted
“Know this child will be gifted”
“With Love”
“With Patience”
“And with Faith”
“She’ll make her way”

People see me
I’m a challenge
To your balance
I’m over your heads
How I confound you
And astound you

To know I must be one of the wonders
Of God’s own creation
And as far as you see
You can offer me no explanation

I believe
Fate smiled and destiny
Laughed as she came to my cradle
“Know this child will be able”
Laughed as my body she lifted
“Know this child will be gifted”
“With Love”
“With Patience”
“And with Faith”
“She’ll make her way”

Wednesday, January 09, 2008

Lawyers, Guns and Money

Shit, Hillary won in New Hampshire.

She actually scares me and I was hoping she would just go away.

As charismatic as her husband was, she is the polar opposite. She may be a nice lady, I have no idea – but her speaking voice, tone and timber just drive me crazy. And the “safe” things she says lack all the believability in the world.

I swear that she believed she had this all locked up before it started.

I’m still hoping for an Obama miracle. He may be an idiot but at least he’s something different.

I am a registered Republican. Walked door to door for Ronald Regan in ’76 and in ’80. Supported the Republican takeover of Mississippi politics and was amazed at the dynamics involved there.

But somewhere along the line – around the “republican revolution” in 1994 when it was decided by Lee Atwater and Newt Gingrich that the best course of action was to declare war on the democrats. Not to allow them to even have a meeting room for their meetings. No golf, no lunch, no contact at all. Simply ground government to a halt by being obstructionist in nature.

I just hate the way things are going. So I’m for anything that even hopes to change anything in Washington, DC.

We are not the “bright, shining example” of how democracy should work anymore. There is no compromise – only “my way or the highway”.

But, with that said, the only thing that really scares me about the Democrats is that there is a likelihood of some kind of uber-gun control thing going to happen.

I am not at all for that.

Controlling guns is akin to controlling teenage hormones. It just can’t be done. The bad guys will always be able to get guns because they don’t follow the rules – so that just leaves the law abiding folks to follow the rules.

Which means the bad guys have the upper hand.

And that ain’t right.

I’m certainly not a hate-monger nor am I an alarmist, anarchist or even a crazed paranoid schizophrenic butthead. But I do believe in being able to protect myself and my family and I carry a gun with me most places.

And I will kill someone if they threaten mine.

That is one of our God-given rights that is also protected by the constitution. Our constitution. But it’s more than a man-law. It’s a law of nature to be able to protect you and yours. So I go into my support of the Dem’s with full knowledge that we will butt heads at some point in the future about this subject.

In the meantime, I want to remind all of you about some of the reasons why it’s important to be able to protect yourself:

1. Most people will never need a gun for protection – those that do will need it BADLY

2. If you find yourself in a fair fight – your tactics suck.

3. An armed man will kill an unarmed man with monotonous regularity

4. Don’t pick a fight with an old man or a woman – if they’re too old or weak to fight you – they’ll just kill you.

5. Why do I carry a .45? Because they don’t make a .46!

So there you have it. I’m thinking I’ve got all my politics out of me today so now I can just concentrate on the monotonous details of the workday.

Please be nice today. Tell someone that needs to hear it how much you care about them. Remind those that you love how much they mean to you.

And call your momma.

And don't forget to watch out for bad guys!


Tuesday, January 08, 2008

Love Blisters

I got you with the title, didn't I? Hooked you right in!

If love was bliss...............I'd be one big blister.

I'm startin' out 2008 realizing that I'm a very lucky boy and trying to thank my lucky stars whenever I can.

What is an amazing woman worth?



Friday, January 04, 2008

There Will Be Blood

Well, after yesterday, the campaign is now in full swing.

Are you ready to be dazzled with bullshit and have softballs thrown at you for you to smack over the fence?

It hasn't really even started and I'm already tired of it.

So before I launch into a political sermon, I just wanted to say that I think Obama-mania is good for America.

No one knows what he stands for and what he will do - but at least he's saying all the right things such as "out with the old and in with the new".

The old is so very bad.

I don't know if we fully appreciate the march backwards we have been engaged in since Bill jizzed all over Monica's dress.

Poor George, who seems like such a likeable knucklehead but just can't put one foot in front of the other has ruined our standing in the free world.

Whoever takes over will face a recession and more fence building than can be done in a reasonable time period. We are about to be mired in something we don't like. I can promise you that.

Huckabee seems like a likeable fellow - but it's hard to trust a baptist preacher from where I sit. We don't need anyone else meddling in the government/religion stuff. That needs to be left alone to settle out while cooler head prevail.

Historically, the nation held it's breath while Catholic boy JFK was elected - wondering if the Pope would rule our country. Which was stupid to even consider in hindsight. JFK had the rock star thing going for him that allowed him to rise above all that.

And that's what I hang my hat on about Obama. He seems to have that thing - charisma or whatever you want to call it that give people hope.

Just like Slick Willy did.

I've never quite understood that stuff but I do know that Bill Clinton can speak and make you believe in something. It's quite amazing.

And isn't that what we need?

Isn't that what the world needs?

Belief is the biggest thing we have going for us. With belief there will be effort in the process which in itself will bring results.

So many things rely on that. Our monetary system relies on the world's faith that the US Dollar is rock solid. It ain't backed by gold at Ft. Knox anymore, ya know? It's all about what the world thinks that drives our economy.

And the world don't think so much of us right now.

You want to see oil prices go way up? Just see if the dollar falls more and the world oil markets start using the EuroDollar for it's currency. You won't believe how fast those digits will rise.

See, look what you've done - I'm in full on political/philisophical mode now.............

Anyway, I tire of these campaigns. I hate the negative adds and they'll be a comin'.

I truly believe that if we as Americans just said STOP, maybe they would. I don't know. There is so much money tied up in this stuff, maybe we can't stop.

But we can hope.

And we can certainly believe.

So let's try real hard to believe that change is coming and it's going to be better and see if maybe, in our own lives, we can start to make a difference there.

Change a heart, change a life.

That's my new slogan.

Come join me.


Wednesday, January 02, 2008

Sugar Bowl Adventures

Well, we made it into the new year and have charted a course for eternity!

First stop: New Orleans.............

We cheered in the new year with friends and some amazing fireworks. I mean, really amazing fireworks!!!

I was the designated driver so my baby could drink - and then on the way home, we say exactly ZERO road blocks and no cops. I could have weaved all the way home and still been safe.

But it was a good time, none the less.

We awoke to the new year with me in the kitchen preparing the traditional new year's feast. We had corned beef and cabbage, black eyed peas, sausage with onions and peppers and some kind of kick ass hash brown casserole that my love prepared - much to the delight of everyone! Finish that meal off with some hot cornbread and all was well in the world.

We took off for New Orleans after lunch and arrived in a wind storm and the temp dropping.

We decided, without even having to talk about it that we wouldn't "wander around the French Quarter" - because it was just too damn cold.

So we "rested" for a while, tee hee, at our hotel and then got dressed to go to the game.

We discussed who we would be for, since we really didn't care about either team so much. There is always the "Southern Connection" that means that all of us rebs need to cheer for teams from the South - so that put Georgia in the catbird's seat. But as we hit the rush of people (it seemed like all 75,000 of them were trying to get there at the same time) we ran full into the Georgia-ites and their drunken debauchary.

It didn't sit well with either of us, and then while we were going to our seats - there was the Georgia battle cry of "my grandparents killed your grandparents in Vietnam" thing that just sealed the deal.

We were now officially for Hawaii.

Luckily, we were sitting in the middle of the Hawaii section so that worked out pretty well for us - initially.

We had amazing seats. 50 yard line about 8 rows up from the field. Right close to the action, which is hard to get in the Superdome.

We got to see the "hula girls" from the Hawaii band (not too shabby!) and got to see the bizarre but cool "war dance" that the Hawaii team did before they retired to the locker room before the game.

The excitement was building and it was going to be fun. The people from Hawaii were tickled to be there and were very happy. My baby was talking to the Hawaii people sitting by us in hopes they would extend an invitation to stay at their house in Hawaii - but that was before I got up eleventy-four times to go get drinks and made them have to get up to let me by! Oh well.

So I won't bore you with the game details, but before the first minute of the game was up - it was apparent to anyone watching that Hawaii was way, way, way overmatched by the SEC.

It was a massacre of biblical proportions.

The final score was 41-10 and that was in no way indicative of what it could have been. Georgia could have won by 10 touchdowns if they had tried too.

I hate that the folks from Hawaii spend a years salary to come to that thing hoping against hope that they could leave with some success on the national stage. But that's football for ya!

We left half way through the third quarter and were going to get something to eat - but again - it was just too damn cold. So we went back to the hotel and went night-night.

All was well until 4:27am when the GD fire alarm went off in the hotel and we all had to evacuate.

Did I mention how cold it was?

Some drunken Georgia asshole apparently decided to smoke in his room and then entire hotel had to evacuate.

Luckily for the asshole, we didn't know who it was because he would have been lynched as sure as I am sitting here right now!

So after a while, we went back up, got undressed again and went back to sleep for a few hours.

And that's all the excitement that we've had in this here new year - so far.

Here's hoping yours will be great and remember, if you love, love with all your heart and the rest of your life will fall into place.

I promise it will!